Monday, January 25, 2010

At a loss....

Right now I feel just at a total and complete loss for words and feelings, but yet I am able to cry at the drop of a hat.

Last night I lost someone very near and dear to my heart. My Grandpa Bill passed away after suffering from a stroke late Saturday evening. This was the great man who baptized me and was my family witness when I was married to Andy in the Bountiful Temple.

Grandpa Bill gave the best hugs, he would hold me close and tight, and for an extended period of time, I knew after hugging him how much he loved me. I am going to miss those hugs so much and in the past twelve hours I keep trying to remember the feeling of the last one I got from him.

As of right now at this moment I don't know much of what is happening next. I do know that I am thankful for the great blessings of my amazing husband who scooped me the largest bowl of vanilla ice cream topped with home made fudge sauce (thanks to Jill who showed up with dinner last night), for my sister-in-law who is doing everything in her power to get me to Utah for the funeral, for my three amazing children all who gave me hugs and wiped away my tears, for the baby that is growing in my belly who's heartbeat I heard this morning for the first time, and for my Father in Heaven who's amazing love has carried me through so much and I know he will carry me through this.

*As of 9:00 p.m. on Monday night, I am going to Utah for the funeral thanks to a buddy pass, please pray that the buddy system works!

10 comments:

Jill said...

wish i could do more than just dinner. we are thinking of you and hope you can get out there for his funeral.

Unknown said...

Sorry to hear your sad news. That's so rough. I've got you in my thoughts and prayers. What can I do for you?

Jennifer said...

SHAY! I am so sorry to hear about your grandpa. My Dad has buddy passes for Delta Airlines if that will help? I was shocked to hear you are pregnant again! I am so happy for you :) Love ya! Jen....email me or feel free to call if you would like a buddy pass.

The Coombs Family said...

So sorry Shay. I can only imagine how important he has been for you. He still will be though. I love ya. I actually just got on the computer to get your address because I'd written ya a little note. We are always thinking of you guys. You'll be in my prayers. Wish we were closer.

D said...

Shay I love you and want you to know that we are all here for you to help you get through this sad time. I also want you to know that we all would do anything for you and that is why I made the phone call to Ashlee and asked if she could help us out. Once again I love you and I can't wait to see you.

sarah.jones said...

So sorry to hear of your loss. You're in my thoughts and prayers.

Ross & Stacie said...

Shay, I am so sorry for your loss. Hugs to you during this very difficult time. Love you girl.

andrea said...

Love you! Call me once from Utah! I hope you have fun seeing your family, and remembering your Grandpa.

Lauralee said...

Shay I'm praying for you! Take care.

Erin said...

Shay I am so sorry for your loss and all you had to go through in getting to Utah. I glad it worked out so well in the end. It was wonderful seeing you and beautiful litte Tessa....what a doll!